I think one of the biggest misconceptions I had about the journey back to Self and Spirit was the idea there was a final destination. A belief that I was going to someday cross a finish line signifying the end of the inner work and rediscovery of my true nature. Kind of like a piece of really complicated furniture from Ikea with hundreds of parts. I assumed that at some point, it would all come together, then I would sit back and marvel at what I had built and get on with the rest of my life. Holy cow was I wrong.
The underlying agenda for the search of “the end” has mostly been a source of disappointment and frustration. Countless times I have found myself exasperated as something I thought was resolved resurrected itself in my life. I would rail against the presence of the intruder. I would exhaust myself trying to exterminate it out of existence.
This never worked. How much effort and energy have I exerted trying to fight what I now see as the natural rhythm of Creation? Probably enough to power a small continent for a year. At least.
Certainly there have been moments of completion. The experience of something being done or finally finished as a part of life is absolutely real. Like chapters in a book, the turning of the page does occur. Yet the notion that any story is a singular volume isn’t the case. Chapters begin and end, narratives come to a conclusion, but the story itself is endless.
Everything has a cycle. Nature teaches me this time and time again. Seasons move from seed to flower to fruit to harvest to decay and dormancy. Some things are annuals and are alive for a short time. Some things are perennial and will always return. Everything has a purpose and a place. Nothing is wasted, and It’s up to me whether I accept (or fight) what’s in front of me. Once I accept the rhythms and cycles of Life, a sense of ease is able to return. Struggle drops away when I no longer try to plant Watermelon in the dead of Winter.
I believe that suffering is created by the desire to vacate (or control) the present moment. The most powerful realization for me has been that surrender is the antidote for the misery of fighting Life itself. Surrender isn’t a claim of powerlessness, quite the contrary. Surrender is essentially understanding that I am Spirit in a co-creative dance with Itself. Sometimes it’s up to me to lead. In those moments, I am called to be decisive and make selections. That’s the doing. Sometimes it’s up to me to follow. In those moments it’s my job to stay open, present, and receptive. That’s the being.
Either way, I am always a part of the dance.
If you’re looking for some keys to access and cultivate surrender, here are a few perspectives that have helped me over the years.
🔑 “Nothing is my adversary.”
🔑 When you’re feeling triggered or activated by someone or something, come back to your breath. Take a few deep full inhales followed by complete exhales and ask of yourself “ In this moment, do I need to be a witness or a participant?”
🔑 Relieve yourself of the notions of right and wrong, and simply accept that in any given set of circumstances there is inherent value present. Rather than creating judgement about it, focus on understanding how your current experience offers you something valuable.
I Love you,
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